Normally I post something related to children with special needs because that’s my job. Today I have something different on my mind: “step-families”. My husband and I married this past November and I became an instant mom. He is an 8-year old, baseball loving, super active, crazy boy! So, my husband and I haven’t even been married a year yet. My stepsons mom got remarried this past summer. So he now has his mom and stepdad and his dad (my husband) and myself as his parent structure. You always hear people on social media complaining about their ex or their baby daddy/baby mama and the drama they cause or the problems they cause. I’ll be honest… I was worried about how everything would work out with this parent structure. I was worried that his mom would get upset or mad if my stepson and I became close or if he and I did something together. I was worried that she would try to hurt my husband by keeping him away because she didn’t want him around me. The list goes on. However, before this school year started we all sat down and worked out his after school schedule, his schedule with each set of parents, his birthday party, etc. We have a group text message where we can all communicate about things he may need. I am able to call or text her and vice versa if something is needed or my husband can’t talk at that moment because he is working. More families need to get over their differences and issues and do what is best for their child or children. Because we are able to communicate about things reasonably, my stepson has become more relaxed and less stressed than he used to be. I wish more people could look beyond themselves to have a situation like this to help their children. Because in the end, it is about what is best for the children.
Rules. Every family has to have them. Some parents are more strict than others. Some children do not seem to have any rules. But there are always some type of rules in a home. I have been considering coming up with some set rules and posting them somewhere in the house as a visual reminder for when they are “forgotten”.
I have an 8-year old step son. For the most part he is a good kid. I feel for him because he has many different sets of rules. At his mom’s he has one set of rules, at his grandparents he has another set of rules, and when he’s with us he has a different set of rules. I’m sure it can get confusing for him sometimes.
However, it is important to have rules so that children learn what life will be like when they get out into “the real world”. Now I’m not saying create a long list of rules that make it almost impossible to live by. That would be terrible for you and your children. Just a few simple rules so that they know what they can and cannot do in the home.
For instance, these are some of the rules we have in our home:
- No running.
- No jumping on the furniture.
- No throwing balls in the house.
Depending on the age of your child(ren), you can make an easy set of rules as well. If you want help writing your rules or making sure your rules are age appropriate feel free to contact me. I don’t mind helping at all!
I like to keep rules short and simple because they are easier to remember. If you have long drawn out rules they will be harder to remember and abide by. Remind your children that you love them and the rules are there to help them. Following the rules is something they will have to do the rest of their lives, whether it’s in school or at work, you are just helping prepare them for life. You need to remember that as well when you want to give in because you made them mad. Just remember, this will help them with life.
The sun is up, it’s a new day. The question is….what will today hold? A day with children, especially during the summer, can be complete chaos. You never truly know what can happen. As a parent you learn to be flexible. You learn to go with the flow. This is good to an extent because you do have to be flexible, but at the same time it is best to keep the kids to a schedule. It helps the chaos. Even during the summer having a schedule helps. Even if your summer schedule is that you go to the pool three days a week for a certain amount of time, at least it is still a schedule!
Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for fun. But, I still keep to a general schedule. This helps by keeping the kids in a routine so that they still get naps and meals at the same time. Which in turn makes for happier children.
All you want is for you children to be happy, right? Keep their routine and that will help them be happier!
Here’s to happy children!